Many years ago, while on a training course, a lecturer burst into the room in a bad mood.

I sat on a table of six and we all thought it was because of something we’d done the night before – largely because we’d all had a bit too much to drink and had got up to some boyish antics. But that wasn’t it.

The bad mood actually had nothing to do with us at all. It had been staged to make a point.

The point being communicated to us on that day was how a first impression counts and how it effects other people.

Why am I telling you this?

A few years ago I discovered that some days I found it easy to get. While on other days I didn’t want to get up at all. I then found that the days I wanted to get up were the days when I was doing something I enjoyed or was looking forward to.

Then I found that when I was getting up to do something entertaining I enjoyed the process of getting up. In fact when I had set it up before going to be, I even woke up with a smile – in the same way I do when it’s my birthday!

So I made a list of the ten things I love doing first thing in the morning and made sure that the first part of my day involved being with as many of these things as possible.

I love ‘sunshine’ music like Bill Withers Lovely day, Katrina and the Waves, Walking on Sunshine, Louis Armstrong’s What a Wonderful World, the less-known Boo Radleys, Wake up it’s a Beautiful Morning and I’m too Sexy for My Shirt, by Right Said Fred. I often play these.

I love running or walking in the cool of the morning just as the sun rises over the Mendip hills and the heat immediately begins to penetrate my skin.

Other things that can set me up for the day are taking a meditative walk in the garden with a hot drink in my hands and taking a slow shower and letting the water tingle over my shoulders.

I also like things that make me laugh in the mornings U tube has become a real plus in this way.

The scene in Anger Management when Jack Nicholson screeches Adam Sandler to a halt and then forces him to ‘De-fluster’ by singing ‘I feel pretty’, is a favorite. As the rush hour drivers zipped by shouting insults this clip made me laugh harder than almost any movie scene I can remember. Have a look here

Recently a friend tipped us off on the Laughing yoga, since then he’s become a regular at the beginning of my working day. My daughter also loves Guinea pigs fighting over cucumber and this has sent her off to school skipping down the road and laughing.

If I’m feeling political or have a feeling that the world is not all it could be I enjoy a little Endless Love between two political leaders. Click here

So why am I saying all this?

I believe making the right impression is important, but especially important when you make it on yourself. Lots of people want to know how to manifest their hearts desire.

They see these things as a house or a car or a holiday, but when it’s all stripped down all any of us want is happiness and love.

We find happiness and love much more readily when we put a smile on our face, feel at peace and can see beauty in other people.

I don’t know about you, but I haven’t yet been approached by someone offering me my dreams when I’m scowling, but I have been offered some wonderful opportunities when I’m laughing and smiling. Perhaps a laugh is attractive – or attracting.

1. Make a list of at least six things that help you to feel good first thing in the morning.

2. On any day you don’t want to get up, allow yourself a few extra minutes to do something you’ll really enjoy.

3. Send me your list. I’d love to know what helps you create a good first impression on yourself first thing in the morning!

With Love and good wishes

Neil

There are times in a person’s life when they may feel stuck. They may be in a situation that is making them unhappy, however they are lacking the motivation or extra push they need to help them create positive change in their life. Sometimes they are not even sure what it is that they want.

If a person is unclear as to what their goal is, they can take a look at each area of their life. Those areas may include: Family, friends, health, career, finances, physical location, hobbies, and also their love life. They can begin by determining on a scale of one to ten (ten being best) how they feel about each of those areas of their life. After they determine which area has the lowest number, they can then think about what they can do to make that area a “ten”.

Once a person has determined what their goal (or dream) is, they can then begin to focus on it by determining what steps they need to take in order to get there. One thing to consider is that even though a person may not be happy with their current situation, it was that situation that launched their dream. So it is important to appreciate where a person is in their life, which helps to create a positive mental attitude. This attitude can help to move a person in the right direction more quickly.

Also, it is a good idea for a person to surround themselves with other people who have similar goals. This support system can add more motivation, and can provide even more ideas which will help them to reach their goal. Determination is very important, because the person who did not reach their goal is usually the one who gave up before they reached the “finish line”. (Consider that Thomas Edison tried 700 times before inventing the light bulb.) Sometimes, a person simply needs to keep trying and not give up.

For someone who could use some extra motivation, a personal life coach can help them to find out what they want, and can help inspire them to get there. Also, a hypnotherapist can provide positive visualization, which helps people to reach their goal more quickly by using the power of the subconscious mind. Combining the two techniques can really help a person to create positive change in their life.

Many people believe that an abundant lifestyle is about having money and everything material. Well if this is what you think, you may be in for a let down.

Of course we would all rather be rich and miserable than poor and miserable, but to have wealth and happiness is achievable.

When your partner comes home after a day at work, greet him/her at the door and say hello. Ask how his/her day went; keep asking it will become a good habit after 21 days.

When your partner leaves for work in the morning, say Goodbye and I love you or Have a good day, and make sure you do it with an abundant heart, remembering you want an abundant lifestyle in the future. When you ask your partner a question, make eye contact and listen to the answer.

When your partner faces a challenge at work during the day, ask how it went when you get home. Remember though that because of our natures, it is likely the male will want to shrink into his cave for an hour or so, before discussing such issues.

During your evening meal together, avoid the temptation to watch television or read the paper or mail. Look at your partner and have a conversation.

If you want to make plans that affect how your partner will be spending time, check with him/her first and make sure it is convenient.

When you disagree with something your partner says, pay attention to your response. Do you express your opinion without putting him/her down? You can express your opinion assertively rather than aggressively.

For example, you can say, “I have another opinion. I think we should wait until spring to have the walls painted,” rather than, “That’s silly! We should wait until spring.”

Pay attention to how much of your side of the conversation is asking questions versus making statements. If you tend to be the dominant one, ask more questions. When you ask your partner a question, make eye contact and listen to the answer.

Ask open-ended questions to encourage your partner to open up and talk. Open-ended questions begin like this: What was it like when. Tell me about. What do you think of.

Have you become passive with your partner because that is the easiest way to avoid conflict? Over time, this is not a good idea. You will inevitably begin to build up feelings of resentment because you are stifling your feelings, thoughts, and opinions.

If you think you are choosing passive behaviour too often, think about discussing it with your partner and asking him/her to help you be more assertive.

Researchers have found that people whose marriages last the longest have learned to separate from their families of origin (their own parents and siblings) and have appropriate, healthy boundaries.

They value and honor their own privacy and separateness as a couple. This means they have regular, appropriate contact with their extended family, but that it is not excessive or stifling. How do you compare?

Check your communication with your partner and beware of using you messages. These are statements that begin with the word you. For example: “You should call me from the office and tell me when you will be home”.

You messages are damaging because they make the other person feel bad or disrespected.

If you want to demonstrate to your partner that you respect him or her, try speaking with I messages instead. When you start your statement with I, you are taking responsibility for the statement.

It is less blameful and less negative than the you message. You can use this formula: a. Your feelings b. Describe the behaviour c. Effect on you.

This is how an I message sounds: “When I heard that you had planned a weekend away, I was confused about why you had not asked me first, so I could be sure to get the time off.”

It takes some practice and you have to stop and think about what you are going to say, but your relationship deserves to be handled with care.

Make a list of your partner’s positive qualities. Share them and tell him/her why you think each is true. Ask your partner to do the same for you. Respect each other’s private space. Over time, many couples let this slide.

As the years pass, many couples begin to feel like they are living in the same house, but have parallel lives. Their paths cross in fewer places.

What is the trend in your relationship and what do you want to do about it today? We hope this articles helps you with your quest for an abundant lifestyle